difference in Normal Sex and tantric Sex
Question : What's the difference
between Normal sex & Tantric sex ?
Osho : Your sex act and the tantric
sex act are basically different. Your sex act is to relieve; it
is just like sneezing out a good sneeze. The energy is thrown
out and you are unburdened. It is destructive, it is not
creative. It is good -- therapeutic. It helps you to be relaxed,
but nothing more. The tantric sex act is basically,
diametrically opposite and different. It is not to relieve, it
is not to throw energy out. It is to remain in the act without
ejaculation, without throwing energy out; to remain in the act
merged -- just at the beginning part of the act, not the end
This changes the quality; the complete quality is different
then. Try to understand two things. There are two types of
climaxes, two types of orgasm. One type of orgasm is known. You
reach to a peak of excitement, then you cannot go further: the
end has come. The excitement reaches to a point where it becomes
energy jumps into you and goes out. You are relieved of it,
unburdened. The load is thrown; you can relax and sleep. You are
using it like a tranquilizer.
It is a natural tranquilizer: a good sleep will follow -- if
your mind is not burdened by religion. Otherwise even the
tranquilizer is destroyed. If your mind is not burdened by
religion, only then can sex be a tranquilizing thing. If you
feel guilt, even your sleep will be disturbed. You will feel
depression, you will start condemning yourself and you will
begin to take oaths that now you won't indulge anymore. Then
your sleep will become a nightmare afterwards.
If you are a natural being not too much burdened by religion and
morality, only then can sex be used as a tranquilizer. This is
one type of orgasm -- coming to the peak of excitement. Tantra
is centered on another type of orgasm. If we call the first kind
a peak orgasm, you can call the tantric orgasm a valley orgasm.
In it you are not coming to the peak of excitement, but to the
very deepest valley of relaxation. Excitement has to be used for
both in the beginning. That is why I say that in the beginning
both are the same, but the ends are totally different.
Excitement has to be used for both: either
you are going toward the peak of excitement or to the valley of
relaxation. For the first, excitement has to be intense
-- more and more intense. You have to grow in it; you have to
help it to grow towards the peak. In the second, excitement is
just a beginning. And once the man has entered, both lover and
beloved can relax. No movement is needed. They can relax in a
When the man feels or the woman feels that the erection is going
to be lost, only then is a little movement and
excitement required. But then again relax. You can prolong this
deep embrace for hours with no ejaculation, and then both can
fall into deep sleep together. This -- THIS -- is a valley
orgasm. Both are relaxed, and they meet as two relaxed beings.
In the ordinary sexual orgasm you meet as two excited beings --
tense, full of excitement,
trying to unburden yourselves. The ordinary sexual orgasm looks
like madness; the tantric orgasm is a deep, relaxing meditation.
You may not be aware of it, but this is a fact of biology, of
bio-energy, that man and woman are opposite forces.
Negative-positive, yin-yang, or whatsoever you call them, they
are challenging to each other. And when they both meet in a deep
relaxation, they revitalize each other. They both revitalize
each other, they both become generators, they both feel
livelier, they both become radiant with new energy, and nothing
is lost. Just by meeting with the opposite pole energy is
The tantric love act can be done as much as you like. The
ordinary sex act cannot be done as much as you like because you
are losing energy in it, and your body will have to wait to
regain it. And when you regain it, you will only lose it again.
This looks absurd. The whole life is spent in gaining and
losing, regaining and losing: it is just like an obsession. The
second thing to be remembered: you may or may not have observed
that when you look at animals you can never see them enjoying
sex. In intercourse, they are not enjoying themselves.
Look at baboons, monkeys, dogs or any kind of animals. In their
sex act you cannot see that they are feeling blissful or
enjoying it -- you cannot! It seems to be just a mechanical act,
a natural force pushing them towards it. If you have seen
monkeys in intercourse, after the intercourse they will
separate. Look at their faces: there is no ecstasy in them, it
is as if nothing has happened. When the energy forces itself,
when the energy is too much, they throw it. The ordinary sex act
is just like this, but moralists have been saying quite the
They say, "Do not indulge, do not `enjoy'." They say, "This is
as animals do." This is wrong! Animals never enjoy; only man can
enjoy. And the deeper you can enjoy, the higher is the kind of
humanity that is born. And if your sex act can become
meditative, ecstatic, the highest is touched. But remember
tantra: it is a valley orgasm, it is not a peak experience. It
is a valley experience!
In the West, Abraham Maslow has made this term "peak experience"
very famous. You go into excitement towards the peak, and then
you fall. That is why, after every sex act, you feel a fall. And
it is natural: you are falling from a peak. You will never feel
that after a tantric sex experience. Then you are not falling.
You cannot fall any further because you have been in the valley.
Rather, you are rising.
When you come back after a tantric sex
act, you have risen, not fallen. You feel filled with
energy, more vital, more alive, radiant. And that ecstasy will
last for hours, even for days. It depends on how deeply you were
in it. If you move into it, sooner or later you will realize
that ejaculation is wastage of energy. No need of it -- unless
you need children. And with a tantric sex experience, you will
feel a deep relaxation the whole day.
One tantric sex experience, and even for days you will feel
relaxed -- at ease, at home, non-violent, nonangry,
non-depressed. And this type of person is never a danger to
others. If he can, he will help others to be happy. If he
cannot, at least he will not make anyone unhappy. Only tantra
can create a new man, and this man who can know timelessness,
egolessness and deep non-duality with existence will grow.
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