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Now when you pray,
when you beg, petition for something, it generally comes
into being. When you ask, you receive; but what you
receive will not create order, because what you receive
does not bring clarity, understanding. it only
satisfies, gives gratification but does not bring about
understanding, because, when you demand, you receive
that which you yourself project. How can reality, God,
answer your particular demand?
Can the immeasurable, the unutterable, be concerned with
our petty little worries, miseries, confusions, which we
ourselves have created? Therefore what is it that
answers? Obviously the immeasurable cannot answer the
measured, the petty, the small. But what is it that
answers? At the moment when we pray we are fairly
silent, in a state of receptivity; then our own
subconscious brings a momentary clarity.
You want something, you are longing for it, and in that
moment of longing, of obsequious begging, you are fairly
receptive; your conscious, active mind is comparatively
still, so the unconscious projects itself into that and
you have an answer. It is surely not an answer from
reality, from the immeasurable - it is your own
unconscious responding. So don't let us be confused and
think that when your prayer is answered you are in
relationship with reality. Reality must come to you; you
cannot go to it.
In this problem of prayer there is another factor
involved: the response of that which we call the inner
voice. As I said, when the mind is supplicating,
petitioning, it is comparatively still; when you hear
the inner voice, it is your own voice projecting itself
into that comparatively still mind. Again, how can it be
the voice of reality? A mind that is confused, ignorant,
craving, demanding, petitioning, how can it understand.
reality? The mind can receive reality only when it is
absolutely still, not demanding, not craving, not
longing, not asking, whether for yourself, for the
nation or for another.
When the mind is absolutely still, when desire ceases,
then only reality comes into being. A person who is
demanding, petitioning, supplicating, longing for
direction will find what he seeks but it will not be the
truth. What he receives will be the response of the
unconscious layers of his own mind which project
themselves into the conscious; that still, small voice
which directs him is not the real but only the response
of the unconscious.
In this problem of prayer there is
also the question of concentration. With most of
us, concentration is a process of exclusion.
Concentration is brought about through effort,
compulsion, direction, imitation, and so
concentration is a process of exclusion. I am interested
in so-called meditation but my thoughts are distracted,
so I fix my mind on a picture, an image, or an idea and
exclude all other thoughts. This process of
concentration, which is exclusion, is considered to be a
means of meditating.
That is what you do, is it not? When you sit down to
meditate, you fix your mind on a word, on an image, or
on a picture but the mind wanders all over the place.
There is the constant interruption of other ideas, other
thoughts, other emotions and you try to push them away;
you spend your time battling with your thoughts. This
process you call meditation.
That is you are trying to concentrate on something in
which you are not interested and your thoughts keep on
multiplying, increasing, interrupting, so you spend your
energy in exclusion, in warding off; pushing away; if
you can concentrate on your chosen thought, on a
particular object, you think you have at last succeeded
in meditation. Surely that is not meditation, is it?
Meditation is not an exclusive process - exclusive in
the sense of warding off, building resistance against
encroaching ideas. Prayer is not meditation and
concentration as exclusion is not meditation.
What is meditation?
Concentration is not meditation, because where
there is interest it is comparatively easy to
concentrate on something. A general who is planning war,
butchery, is very concentrated. A business man making
money is very concentrated - he may even be ruthless,
putting aside every other feeling and concentrating
completely on what he wants. A man who is interested in
anything is naturally, spontaneously concentrated. Such
concentration is not meditation, it is merely exclusion.
So what is meditation? Surely meditation is
understanding - meditation of the heart is
understanding. How can there be understanding if there
is exclusion? How can there be understanding when there
is petition, supplication? In understanding there is
peace, there is freedom; that which you understand, from
that you are liberated. Merely to concentrate or to pray
does not bring understanding.
Understanding is the very basis, the fundamental process
of meditation. You don't have to accept my word for it
but if you examine prayer and concentration very
carefully, deeply, you will find that neither of them
leads to understanding. They merely lead to obstinacy,
to a fixation, to illusion. Whereas meditation, in which
there is understanding, brings about freedom, clarity
and 1ntegration.
What, then, do we mean by understanding? Understanding
means giving right significance, right valuation, to all
things. To be ignorant is to give wrong values; the very
nature of stupidity is the lack of comprehension of
right values. Understanding comes into being when there
are right values, when right values are established. And
how is one to establish right values - the right value
of property, the right value of relationship, the right
value of ideas?
For the right values to come into being, you must
understand the thinker, must you not? If I don't
understand the thinker, which is myself what I choose
has no meaning; that is if I don't know myself, then my
action, my thought, has no foundation whatsoever.
Therefore self-knowledge is the beginning of meditation
- not the knowledge that you pick up from my books, from
authorities, from gurus, but the knowledge that comes
into being through self-inquiry, which is
self-awareness.
Meditation is the beginning of
self-knowledge and without self-knowledge there is no
meditation. If I don't understand the ways of my
thoughts, of my feelings, if I don't understand my
motives, my desires, my demands, my pursuit of patterns
of action, which are ideas - if I do not know myself,
there is no foundation for thinking; the thinker who
merely asks, prays, or excludes, without understanding
himself, must inevitably end in confusion, in illusion.
The beginning of meditation is self-knowledge, which
means being aware of every movement of thought and
feeling, knowing all the layers of my consciousness, not
only the superficial layers but the hidden, the deeply
concealed activities. To know the deeply concealed
activities, the hidden motives, responses, thoughts and
feelings, there must be tranquillity in the conscious
mind; that is the conscious mind must be still in order
to receive the projection of the unconscious.
The superficial, conscious mind is occupied with its
daily activities, with earning a livelihood, deceiving
others, exploiting others, running away from problems -
all the daily activities of our existence. That
superficial mind must understand the right significance
of its own activities and thereby bring tranquillity to
itself. It cannot bring about tranquillity, stillness,
by mere regimentation, by compulsion, by discipline.
It can bring about tranquillity, peace, stillness, only
by understanding its own activities, by observing them,
by being aware of them, by seeing its own ruthlessness,
how it talks to the servant, to the wife, to the
daughter, to the mother and so on. When the superficial,
conscious mind 1s thus fully aware of all its
activities, through that understanding it becomes
spontaneously quiet, not drugged by compulsion or
regimented by desire; then it is in a position to
receive the intimation, the hints of the unconscious, of
the many, many hidden layers of the mind - the racial
instincts, the buried memories, the concealed pursuits,
the deep wounds that are still unhealed. It is only when
all these have projected themselves and are understood,
when the whole consciousness is unburdened, unfettered
by any wound, by any memory whatsoever, that it is in a
position to receive the eternal.
Meditation is self-knowledge and without
self-knowledge there is no meditation. If you are not
aware of all your responses all the time, if you are not
fully conscious, fully cognizant of your daily
activities, merely to lock yourself in a room and sit
down in front of a picture of your guru, of your Master,
to meditate, is an escape, because without
self-knowledge there is no right thinking and, without
right thinking, what you do has no meaning, however
noble your intentions are.
Thus prayer has no significance without self-knowledge
but when there is self-knowledge there is right thinking
and hence right action. When there is right action,
there is no confusion and therefore there is no
supplication to someone else to lead you out of it. A
man who is fully aware is meditating; he does not pray,
because he does not want anything. Through prayer,
through regimentation, through repetition and all the
rest of it, you can bring about a certain stillness, but
that is mere dullness, reducing the mind and the heart
to a state of weariness. it is drugging the mind; and
exclusion, which you call concentration, does not lead
to reality - no exclusion ever can.
What brings about understanding is self-knowledge, and
it is not very difficult to be aware if there is right
intention. If you are interested to discover the whole
process of yourself - not merely the superficial part
but the total process of your whole being - then it is
comparatively easy. If you really want to know yourself,
you will search out your heart and your mind to know
their full content and when there is the intention to
know, you will know. Then you can follow, without
condemnation or justification, every movement of thought
and feeling; by following every thought and every
feeling as it arises you bring about tranquillity which
is not compelled, not regimented, but which is the
outcome of having no problem, no contradiction. It is
like the pool that becomes peaceful, quiet, any evening
when there is no wind; when the mind is still, then that
which is immeasurable comes into being.
Source: from book "The First and Last Freedom" by
Jiddu Krishnamurti
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